Rosie and the Incredible Live Animal

*Rosie was a regular. Tall and slender, her costume jewelry dangled when she walked. Her fur coats looked as if she was enveloped in luxury. The click-clack of her heels allowed us all to know that she was near. Her make-up reminded me of the oil paintings that my brother would paint with his steady hand. I would sit and watch him paint, making sure he got it in just the right places. Rosie had one goal and one goal only; fool everyone into thinking she was younger.

On this particular day, Rosie was in need of a Massage Therapy Session not just for her physical well-being, but also for her mental state as well. All that shopping off QVC was just exhausting. As usual, she laid on the massage table face down first. I worked on her aging body quite frequently and knew the secrets that her fur coats were covering up. She was definitely in her 70's. In all my massage sessions, I end with working on the neck while my client is laying face up. Rosie laid face up and closed her eyes. Her false eyelashes rested against her tightened skin. Her long, platinum blonde hair softly hung about her shoulders. I sat on my rolling stool and massaged her shoulders. My mind was cleared and I pushed all judgments aside. "We all have our insecurities," I thought. "I'm sure Rosie has so much to tell me, now here she is, allowing me to make her feel better. What a wonderful opportunity and what great people my clients are." I continued to rub her tight neck and lose myself into my thoughts. I closed my eyes and let my fingers tell me what to do. I rolled my chair towards my aromatherapy oils. Wait. My chair is....stuck? I quickly looked down. Is that? "My hell," I thought, "There's a dead animal in the wheels of my stool!" I glanced at Rosie only to see a peaceful look on her relaxed face and only a few strands of hair left on her head. Her hair crown had fallen to its fateful death and I had rolled over it. I cradled her neck with one hand and begin yanking the animal free with the other. She was none the wiser while I rubbed and yanked. Rubbed and yanked. My wheel had gotten strands wrapped around it. Eventually, the polyester mass was pulled free and I was left wondering what to do with it. "Should I put it back on her head and pretend I'm giving a scalp massage? No, too obvious." I opted to delicately lay "it" on her clothes. I finished the session and went out front in the lobby to wait. As soon as I heard the click-clack of a great Nordstrom find and the jingle-jangle of QVC, I sat up straight and prepared myself for whatever constructive criticism I was to receive.

"That was fantastic!" she whispered in a breathy tone. Rosie placed her gratuity and payment on the front counter and click-clacked her way out the door. In the back of her head was the largest snarl that I have ever seen in my entire life.

*name has been changed

Why am I blogging?

I am blogging because my computer crashed and lost all of my precious, important, earth shattering thoughts.